Jersey Shoreline – Why Indians don’t wear bathing suits at the beach

(photo courtesy Ganesh Sankaran)

Last Sunday at the beach with big strong waves and seaweed-y waters*, a lady came up to me and said, ” Excuse me, are you Indian?” When I replied in the affirmative, she went on to ask the question she really wanted to ask, ” Why don’t Indian people wear bathing suits at the beach?” Her belief was that it is bad enough that you have to be fully clothed everywhere else, but atleast at the beach people should be able to let their guard down and relax. The lady’s observation while quite accurate, is not entirely true. With time more and more Indians are stepping on to beaches and into waters in swimwear, both in India and abroad, probably more abroad than in India.

I put this question later to a group of friends and got a variety of responses. “They feel cold.” ” We don’t need to work on our tan.” ” Don’t have swimwear worthy bodies.”   ” Body image issues.” “Uncomfortable showing skin.”  The Husband brushed it off saying ,” Ofcourse they do. Go to Goa and see.”

Most of this I agree with, some I don’t. The Goa bit is just stretching the truth, because even there it is quite uncommon to see an Indian in swimwear; rarer still an Indian woman. Especially at the more popular and crowded beaches.

So  why don’t a majority of Indian people wear bathing suits at the beach?”

Indians are  uncomfortable showing skin and shape. This is changing, but for now it is true. This is probably a big reason why we prefer to just wet our feet at the beach instead of bathing. Even when we do splash around, we just dunk ourselves fully clothed and  dry out on the sand. We rarely drive or travel long distances to spend an afternoon at the beach in India. Having to sit wet and uncomfortable in a car or bus, plus getting the car seat soggy is not a real problem in our world. In a country where even today covering your head in front of an older person is considered a sign of respect, and women wearing western clothes is often made a big deal of, it is quite  odd to be cavorting on a beach in a swimsuit. It is so uncommon that it tends to draw unwanted attention and disapproving stares. This adds to the existing levels of  discomfort and further dissuades public appearances in swimwear. I am not even talking about bikinis, just a tank suit with a little frill, tights and sleeves. One can always argue that modest as it is, the sight of such a garment is bound make heads turn, but it is not that kind of attention that I’m talking about.

There is nothing though that explicitly forbids Indians from wearing anything they chose, so why is it that even in America, where all of the above doesn’t apply we are still so shy? Reason two – Indians are like pack animals. We like to move around in groups. Our groups are mostly comprised of other Indians, or will atleast have some other Indians. Coming from a country where people have reservations being undressed even in front of people of their own sex, it does make it sort of awkward to be  swimwear clad in front of friends of the opposite sex. It may not be as bad if they were your friends, but very often they happen to be your partner’s friends or partners of your friends. While a lot of this is real, some of this is also in our own heads. The people we hang around with maybe totally cool, but in our minds we imagine that just by wearing swimwear in front of them, suddenly the whole equation goes from **bhabhi-ji to WTF!! That is enough to deter us.

Problem part 3 – we judge our bodies very harshly. We are big, and as a friend put it,  bootyfull. We don’t confirm to the skinny standards of sexiness. This makes us extremely conscious.  To add to our woes, since we have always avoided any show of skin or figure we have had no incentive to get that flat tummy, or put in extra effort to rid ourselves of our thunder thighs and wrestler arms. Frankly we don’t want to reveal what we take great pains to hide under layers of baggy clothing. We have body image issues. We don’t have the confidence to say, “Hey so I don’t have a body like Katrina Kaif or Kareena Kapoor or whoever, but I don’t care. If you don’t like what you see, don’t look. Why on earth are you looking at me anyway?” Men are conscious of their moobs and flabby middle region as well. This might explain why a lot of them prefer to wear swim shirts to the pool and beach.

And yes, we don’t need to work on our tan***.

 

 

* sorry, I don’t remember the name. It is along the Jersey shoreline

** bhabhi-ji – very respectful term for sister in law

*** Infact we spend a considerable amount of resources in doing exactly the opposite, trying to bleach our year round tan into milky whiteness.

A walk in The High Line Park

The High Line Park is a  historic  elevated freight rail line that has been re-purposed as a public park.

This  mile long  aerial  park runs above the streets on Manhattan’s West Side.

Take a walk/jog/run, shop, eat, nap.Smell the flowers. Steal a kiss. Take in the city.

Lake Minnewaska

Lake Minnewaska

Last Saturday, we went to Lake Minnewaska State Park in New York. Although the park has several trails, it is recommended to first timers that they do the  2 mile long trail that takes you around the lake. This trail is more like a long leisurely walk  on a grit paved carriageway, with some scenic views. The walk is dotted with picnic spots and has several selfie worthy points.

Mountain Path

If the mountain goat in you is not satisfied with walking tamely along the lake, take the mountain trail for a real walk in the woods. This trial branches off the  Minnewaska  carriageway and is not a loop. They say it is 1.2 miles to the top, but it sure felt longer.The path down is a 2.5 mile long grit paved carriageway that re-joins the Minnewaska  carriageway. It took us around 2.5-3 hours to get back to the parking lot.

Mountain Man

As always, carry sufficient water and a few health bars.

The Lady is a Tramp (Photos courtesy Ganesh Sankaran aka the Husband)

Bathing is permitted in the lake. Bathers are requested to swim only in the permitted section and when a life guard is present. Had we known this, we would have taken our swim wear along. Beware of leeches in the water though.

There are changing rooms and restrooms near the swimming area. The restrooms are dry toilets. They do not use any water. All waste is composted in pits below the building. A good green initiative, but it does make the toilets stinky.

Yunhi kat jaayega safar saath chalne se..

Once you’ve worked up an appetite with all the walking and swimming, Mountain Brauhaus is a great place to sit down for dinner.This restaurant features traditional German food but includes  some  American dishes as well. We stopped by at 7:00 PM on a Saturday evening and the place was packed to its gills. There was a 1 hour 40 minute waiting! There is a self seating section outside with a limited menu. The bar is self seating as well, with full service. So try to grab bar stools if you can. The food was quite worth the wait. However they bungled up our bill payment. Although the place was not as full anymore by the time we finished our dinner, and despite having brought out the correct check, when the card was charged and the receipt was presented for signing, the amount charged was 10 times the billed amount. When this was pointed out they were quick to correct their mistake, but I strongly recommend checking before accepting the bill and signing the receipt.

Starbucks, Times Square

 

When old friends meet in the middle of the night at Times Square what you get is madness.

Bushkill Falls, PA

Bushkill Falls, PA

The Falls

On Sunday we drove down to the Bushkill Falls in Pennsylvania. The Bushkill falls are a series of 8 waterfalls. These falls can be easily accessed through well maintained trails. There are 4 trails, colour coded based on length and difficulty level.  We took the Red. This is the longest and is supposed to be the hardest. If you are even reasonable fit, this trail is not hard to do. Just make sure you have good shoes on your feet.

The Husband

We saw young children, families with babies strapped on and even pets on this trail, so it is definitely doable.  There isn’t much water in the falls right now, and there are boards all along the way warning you of this. The woods however, are lovely; dark and deep, and the walk to the falls, despite the crowds, is quiet and enjoyable.

The Trail

It is a pity they don’t allow dipping in the waters here, probably a blessing too in terms of safety and cleanliness. I am not sure about the water quality of the creeks, so it would be wise to carry your own water on the trails.

The Poser (photos courtesy Ganesh Sankaran aka the husband)

I liked the path we took as it builds up well. We started with a view from the top of the Main falls, went on to see the Bridal Veil falls, Bridesmaids falls and Lower Gorge falls, and ended with a view from the bottom of the Main falls.  Had we done it the other way round it may not have been as exciting. We skipped the part of the trail leading to the Pennel falls.

How can you NOT fall in love!!

They say the Red trail is for avid hikers, but it more of a long walk through woods and stairs really. Word of warning, there are plenty of steps/stairs.

Our route, follow the Red trail and the big black arrows

Cycling in Liberty State Park, NJ

Liberty State Park, NJ

We thought we would go to Watkins Glen State Park, NY this weekend. Hiking and camping were on the cards. Saturday came and found us fast asleep till high noon. When we woke up, we settled on cycling in Liberty State Park instead. Now the cycle rentals there shut at 6 PM. By shut, I mean you have to return the cycles by 6 PM.  We reached the park a little before six, thinking you just had to rent out before closing hours, so we couldn’t  rent  cycles. This turned out to be not such a bad thing after all as the park does not have too many trees, so there is no shade so to speak over the cycling lanes and even at 6 PM the sun was still going strong.

The highlights of Liberty Park are – you get a great view of the NYC skyline; the Statue of Liberty cruises from here are way cheaper than the cruises from Battery Park NYC; a lovely shady family picnic area that can be reserved. As far as cruises go, you could take the Staten Island ferry from Manhattan, which is absolutely free, but the ferry does not take you as close to the statue as tourist boats do.

 

San Diego – Betting at the Horse Races

Remember how I said there is always something planned  for me in SD. This time it was the races. I have been wanting to go to the horse races for almost ever now. This experience was quite an eye opener. Firstly, the horses do not run multiple laps like I had imagined. Horses are not cars. They run 1 round of 1 mile or 3/4ths of a mile. At the club, there were as expected, ladies in their dresses and hats, and unexpectedly, there were children, some so young that they were in strollers.  Unlike casinos, there is no age limit to enter the Del Mar Thoroughbred Club.

The Del Mar Thoroughbred Club was also our introduction to Uber – the fixed rate call taxi service. We called Uber to be dropped and picked up from the club. We had Groupons to enter, but when we got there, there was a promotional scheme going on, and now I think we have some kind of membership to the club. The membership card gets us free entry. It also gets us discounts on food and beer, but as we discovered not on all beers or all foods.

When I reached the counter to place a bet, the lady on the other side asked me, “To win?” A little confused about the question, I nodded yes.  When I was asked the same question while placing a bet for the next race, I asked the gentleman across, if it was possible to bet to lose. He laughed and explained that there were 3 types of bets that could be placed – win,  place – that is to come second and  show – to come third. I now understand that place means the horse you bet on must come either first or second and show means your horse must come 1st, 2nd or 3rd. I have found out that there is yet another type of bet that can be placed – exacta. This means you play two horses. They must come in first and second in exact order to collect.

Each race  ends in less than a few minutes. The races are spaced about 20 mins apart. This gives you just about enough time to saunter up to the counter and collect your winnings, decide on your pick for the next race, place your bets, grab some food/drink and get back to the stalls. You need reservations for the tables in the balconies, but the stalls are open seating or standing. People had brought their beach chairs to sit in the stalls.

When we left a few hours later, we had made a net profit of $3 on our meager bets.

 

 

The Roadtrip from Phoenix to San Diego- Day 3, Part 2

Day 3 – The Redemption – (Antelope Canyons and) Sedona

We finished viewing both Antelope Canyons by lunch time. After lunch we got into the car, and as we gathered ourselves for the long long drive ahead the husband had yet another change of mind. Our misadventure with American Airlines on Day 1 had earned us a $200 voucher. The car rental company told us we would save around $150 if we returned the car at Phoenix instead of at San Diego (SD) as planned earlier. If we didn’t drive we would save on gas. Two tickets from Phoenix to SD would cost us around $400. We bought ourselves flight tickets from Phoenix to San Diego.

That however, was not the end of our roadtrip. Since we had time to spare, we decided  to drive down to Sedona before returning the car and taking the flight. Our GPS decided the adventure cannot end so soon, so it put us on a path through absolute .. absolutely nowhere. We drove past stunning scenery, and a herd of sheep till we reached a road block. Since the GPS wouldn’t help,we turned around and asked google maps to show us an alternate way. The GPS continued to insist we ignore the road block, even asking us to go off road at one point. Then we hit another block. A long line of cars ahead of us had come to a standstill. Soon a long line had formed behind us as well. The road ahead had been temporarily shut for re-tarring. Half an hour later we were on our way again.

Nowhere

We reached Sedona close to sunset. To reach the town center we drove through  the gorgeous Slide Rock Park, drinking in the view. The tired sun on his way home bathed the red rocks with his warmth and made them glow against the blue skies. Coral on Turquoise.I highly recommend rolling down your windows and breathing in the smell of this place. I can’t quite place it except that it was good.

The drive through Slide Rock Park

In Sedona, the husband wanted to go the see the red rocks while I was keen on checking out the vortices. A vortex is a spot where you can feel the earth’s natural energies. Some are positive, some negative and some neutral. I am not a believer, but I am inquisitive. Finally we reached a consensus on where to go.The Bell Rock vortex was smack on the scenic byway, so we could do both.

 

Scenic Byway

We parked in the parking lot at the Cathedral Rock vista and made our way towards the Bell Rock. As we approached the Bell Rock we saw a man walking ahead of us pause and make some gestures not once but twice. Unable to contain my curiosity I caught up with him and chatted. He was asking permission to enter. It was something he had learnt from a tribe in Mexico. He sat down at the bottom of the rock. I asked him if he had ever made it to the top. He said  no, the energies were too strong for him up there. Curiouser and curiouser, I asked where we could feel the  energies and he replied “Why right here, but you have to slow down. If you are so high on your own energy, you won’t be able to feel a thing.”

Bell Rock Vortex

I decided the rock was calling me and acted on it. The stranger said there was a trail and if we couldn’t find it, “follow your heart“. Sure enough, there was a trail, but oddly a short distance later the trail just disappeared. From here the only way up was to scramble over the rocks. For someone who has spent her childhood summers scrambling over wave breakers at the local beach, it was fairly simple. The husband decided he preferred to stay where he was and take pictures. I stopped at the foot of the Bell. We were running out of time and the husband was already making furious gestures below. I sat down for a few minutes to feel the energies, but all I got was dirty looks from the husband.

I didn’t feel any energy wash over me, or get a headache, or feel dizzy. I didn’t feel a thing. I guess I didn’t wait long enough for my own energies to cool off.  Energy or no energy, the place is magnificent and the climb is fun. It probably gets progressively harder, which would explain the rush when you get to the top.

We made it to Phoenix  airport well in time for our flight. The flight took off on time and landed safely in San Diego. On the way to the airport we saw  what I can only describe as this incredible beam of dark. A perfect contrast to the light beams we went looking for in the Upper Antelope Canyon.

A beam of Dark

From the disastrous start to the fabulous finish this trip has definitely been more than more than we bargained for.

The Navajo Life

On the way back from the Canyons, our guide told us a little about the Navajo way of life; their traditions and beliefs. As I heard her speak, a thought formed in my mind ” Indians are Indians, Native American or Asian.”  Did you know that  in Navajos, children of siblings are considered siblings. This has given rise to using terms like “cousin-brother” and “cousin-sister” to define relationships in English and that the literal translation for your mother’s sister is “little Mother.”  Another thing that is common with Hindu Asian Indians is that tradition dictates that Navajos do not eat when there is an eclipse.

A very interesting titbit about the Navajos that I read online is that the Navajo language lacks a direct method of commanding another person and traditional Navajo consider it extremely poor manners to tell or order another person to do something.

Our guide told us how her people wake up at the crack of dawn and end their day with the last rays of the sun; how they led their lives without electricity or running water; how she wasn’t allowed to wear make-up growing up. I can almost hear my mother ( grandmothers and aunts) saying, “Makeup is for grown ups who want to look younger. You are young. You don’t need makeup.” ” If you use makeup, your skin will get used to it and a day will come when you will look so haggard without it. You will then be forced to use makeup.” Our guide told us how her children hate it  when she sends them to the reservation every summer to spend time with her family, and how they hate it when it is time to come back home. All those vacation we were forced to spend in Chennai come flooding back.

Her words provided me insight into how at least a section of the Navajos felt about the “white man”. While the older generation was distrustful, the newer lot are more determined to reclaim their heritage. I must add here, that our guide at the lower canyon was much younger and didn’t seem to feel as strongly about the Navajo way of life.

 

The Roadtrip from Phoenix to San Diego- Day 3, Part 1

Day 3 – The Redemption – Antelope Canyons (and Sedona)

In beauty I walk

With beauty before me I walk

With beauty behind me I walk

With beauty above me I walk

With beauty around me I walk

It has become beauty again

-Extract from a Navajo Prayer

Water Painting (Lower Antelope Canyon)

Our new plan was to queue up outside the Lower Antelope Canyon tour office at 7:00 am to get on the first tour at 8:15 AM or so and then do the upper canyon tour as booked at 10:30 AM. Before we went to bed, the husband changed his mind and said if we did it that way we would reach San Diego really late as the drive was too long. We agreed that we would drop the lower and do just the upper canyon.  Early next morning we went to the tour booking office to see if we could move our Upper Antelope Canyon Tour from 10:15 AM the 8:30 AM slot. Turns out that was not possible as that tour was booked out and we could not cancel the 10:15 tour since it was no longer  refundable.  The plan then went back to run and catch the first tour to the lower canyon and make it back in time for the upper canyon tour.

The Mountain Lion (Lower Antelope Canyon)

The lower canyon  area can be reached only by a short dirt road. The tour offices are visible from the paved road, but it is easy to miss the turn. The coal power plant is an excellent landmark. The track goes off the road opposite the power plant. The power plant itself is easily identifiable with its three smoking chimneys. The marina is straight down the power plant road. Before you reach the marina, you will pass a statue of a bucking bull on the side of the road that the power plant is. If you are going to the marina, keep going straight. If you were headed to the canyon, turn around. Occasionally one can see a coyote crossing this road.

Interestingly, the Lower Antelope Canyon was brought to public notice by the construction workers building the power plant. This area used to be  their labour camp site.

By the time we got the booking office, the first tour had already left, a few moments of discussion cost us a place on the second tour as well, but it is hard to refuse the girl with a big band-aid on her head so with some  minimal pleading  we got on to the tour. This canyon is below ground and is accessed through a series of ladders. Some ladders can be steep and few are missing handrails,  also in some places the canyon gets really narrow but it is not at all hard to go through.

The Howling Wind (Lower Antelope Canyon)

The beauty of the canyons is such that it now haunts me wherever I go.A little bit of imagination will reveal a whole new world to you.

As light moves in the canyon, the walls change from red to orange to gold to every imaginable shade of pink. Run your hands along the walls and read the stories that water has carved into them. At every turn, wondrous shapes leap out, like pictures in a book. Read if you can the story the mountain lion or the thief or the eagle.  The grumpy troll, the howling wind, the river goddess.. the stories weave seamlessly into each other and  possibilities are endless. The fabulous shapes and spectacular colors turn the canyon from a mass of rock to a book of worship filled with extraordinary tales of sins and retributions. We walk around slack jawed and wonderstruck.

We made it back to the tour office well in time for our upper canyon tour. The tour guide drives you down to the canyon with the rest of your group. If you are in one of the open vehicles, make sure to hold onto your hats. Our guide told us this was an excellent spot to pick up hats, because they keep flying off from the heads of tourists. A good part of the route is on bumpy sand,  and on very dry hot days it is not unusual to see vehicles stuck in the it. It was not that hot when we went, but it was a hot day and for once in my life I was weather appropriately dressed in a pair of shorts, a tank top, a hat and sunglasses.

The Messenger (Upper Antelope Canyon)

The rich hues that we saw in the Lower Canyon were not as prominent in the Upper Canyon.The draw of this canyon are the shafts of light that pierce through like messengers from another world. The imposing walls give it the appearance of  a magnificent cathedral. An exalted place where spirits convene. No man-made structure can match it in grace. The little flecks of dust dancing in the beams add just the touch of reality to this surreal scene.

Heart of the Canyon (Upper Antelope Canyon)

Even so, if  you have to choose between visiting the two, and are reasonably fit, make sure you do the Lower one. There are other less known and therefore hopefully less crowded canyons to explore like the Owl Canyon, Canyon X and the Rattlesnake Canyon . There are 6 canyons open to public here. Our Navajo guide assured us that the gorgeous colours and dancing light beams could be seen in other canyons as well, they are just not as popular because they are harder to access.

 

 

Antelope Canyons

The Antelope Canyons were named for the antelope that used to roam freely in this area before human settlement and activity pushed them out. Great horned owls and rattlesnakes still populate these canyons. That is how those canyons got their names. It is not uncommon to see owls in the Upper Antelope Canyon. We were not so lucky, but we did see their nests.

We went with the Dixie Ellis  company for the Lower Antelope Canyon tour and with Overland tours for the Upper Antelope Canyon tour. Both companies were very  accommodating and both tour guides were wonderful. The guides also help you with setting up your camera and composing  your pictures.

We were informed by our tour operator that we could not have chosen a worse time to visit. Summer is not just hot, it is also thunderstorm season. Since the canyons are prone to flash flooding, whenever a flood warning is issued, the canyons are shut down for the day. This happens when it rains not just in this area but also if it rains heavily upstream. Summer is also peak tourist season. The best season to visit, in all respects would be spring. Another thing, if you are visiting during daylight savings period, please note Arizona does not participate in daylight savings but the Navajo Reservation is on Daylight Savings Time. Sometimes your phone or car clock may not grasp this automatically, so every time you cross the reservation border reset your watch, or keep it in mind. It gets more complicated because the Hopi Reservation, which is surrounded by the Navajo reservation, stays on Arizona (Non-Daylight Savings) time.

Size does matter

I am not sure if you can do a guided tour of the Navajo reservation, but you can do one of the Hopi reservation.  These tours are not very expensive and would give you an insight to the lives and customs of Native American/American Indian tribes. I didn’t known about this, or we would have definitely tried to squeeze it into our trip. You do however get to interact with the Navajo people as entry into the Canyons is not permitted without a Navajo guide, not even to Navajos. The Canyons are on reservation land.

Another thing we didn’t do was go to Bearizona. Our waiter at Dennys told us about it. It sure looks like fun. If you are wondering where Dennys came in, we stopped at a Dennys for dinner, on the way from Phoenix to the Grand Canyon.

Page is probably the best place to be if you want to disconnect from the world. The whole time we were there, our phones had very patchy reception. Mine worse than the husband’s. I have an iphone5 and we are both on AT&T, so this could also be a phone and service provider issue. I had a similar problem at the Grand Canyon as well, only there I had some internet connectivity and zero phone signal. The husband had both phone and internet connectivity there. He has a Samsung Galaxy S3.

More photographs here and here